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Hi All,

Today it is seven years ago that my families world changed...

To be honest, I never think about the driver and when I do it is without attachment or emotion.

But today, I find myself thinking about her. I wonder if she is thinking about us.

On one level, I think, of course she is thinking about us, it is silly to think that today is not significant to her, but, I can't be 100% sure.

Maybe it doesn't matter anyway . What can they do - send a letter or a card?

Some people would like that, some people would hate that.

Seriously, best case scenario, what can a driver do for a family to make things better?



Written on 11 Mar 2011
Over 15 years since incident
Tags: anniversary, driver

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Photo for user Judy Hibble

Judy Hibble | 16 Mar 2011

Hi Sandra,
My heart goes out to you and your family. It is only natural to think about the person that was responsible for your Dad’s death and all the grief and pain she has caused your family. I often think about the man that killed my son even though I have never seen him as I didn’t go to court (couldn’t bring myself to go.) I wonder if he ever has any remorse or remembers each year on the anniversary.
Who knows. I think an apology or some show of remorse for their actions in the first instance would go a long way towards healing. I have a lot of anger towards this person which I know doesn’t help and don’t think I can ever forgive. Can you forgive someone who doesn’t seek forgiveness?
P.S. For some reason your post has shown up on Maureen’s blog.

Hugs, Take care
Judy x x

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Julie McIntyre | 17 Mar 2011

OMG Sandra where did those years go..time moves so slow yet so fast..It was great to see you and your Mum last Saturday. Take Care and we will catch up again soon. xxx

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Maureen McKenzie | 18 Mar 2011

Sandra I’m sorry I seem to have ‘taken over’ your blog – how can that be changed? Don’t understand!! Well, through the tragic death of your dad you’ve helped so many by setting up this site – he’d surely be proud of you now!! So lovely to meet you and your mum on Sat. just wish there was more time to get to know you both. You are so young, yet so very wise! Thanks and take care….Mx


Dawn Williams | 22 Mar 2011

Hi Sandra,
You do wonder what the drivers that cause the accident that takes the life of your loved one think on the anniversary day. You, the innocent one gets the life sentence. I beleive a show of genuine remorse and an apology for the pain and suffering that has been delivered to your family, would go a long way to help you deal with all the emotions you go through, trying cope with the sudden death of a loved one.
It was good to meet you and your Mum on Saturday.
My thoughts are with you both today and hope you both find the strength get through the 7th anniversary.
Lots of hugs
Dawn Williams

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Tyele | 09 Apr 2011

I have never had someone taken from me but i imagine if it did happen the best thing they could do was to live their life in honour of the victim and their family. Many people are overcome with grief due to taking someones life and fall apart, then two lives are lost.

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Site founder | 16 May 2011


I only just saw all these messages!!!

Thanks guys.

Yes it is my blog, yes it is showing as Maureen,…. we are trying to fix this issue!!!!!

Photo for user ANN LEWIS

ANN LEWIS | 18 Jun 2012

Hi Sandra,

Time goes past so quickly doesn’t it Sandra. As Maureen said, your dad will be so proud of all you’ve achieved with this site.You’ve given us a place to meet others in the same position, and although it’s gone quiet on here of late, there are messages of love and support going on privately too, and this has all come about because of you my friend.

Now I’m madly jealous because you met up without me, but I hope we can do it again some day, and I’m so grateful for the lifelong friends I’ve met on this site, thanks to you Sandra.

Love and hugs, Ann xx

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